Maybe I'm a little too stubborn for my own good. I have a few friends on their way to being doctors, but that is one place I hate to visit. Why? I don't know. I guess it's just that fear that something will be wrong with me. Last year was my first time visiting one. I went for a specific reason but even then I found a way out of it. I just had a basic physical exam. Eventually I went back for the reason that I first thought of going for in the first place. My worst fear wasn't realized but there was still a problem. It's been nearly a year and I still haven't dealt with it. I'm still at that age where I feel invincible. I know it's not true, but I just don't want to admit the fact that my body is falling apart. I'm getting older so I need to deal with these things before they get too far out of hand. I'm speaking for myself but this is a common attitude for most of the men that I know. It comes from sports for me. We're basically trained to play through every bit of pain that we feel. If we don't we're viewed as "soft." I'm done with sports now but I still feel the effects of injuries I suffered back in junior high. I don't know how I feel about this whole situation. I can't be mad...well I can because I know some of those coaches don't care about risking your health if it helps them win. I regret keeping those injuries to myself. Now I'm having possibly serious ailments and I still have that mentality that I did back then, that it will all go away in time. So when does that day come?
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